The Cow's Meow

Shooting the Shit

2009-12-19T01:01:00.000-08:00

So on the ride home, My friend Winnie and I came up with what we thought was a pretty cool idea:

we buy a brand new Leica- M series (film), shoot with it for 1 day each, then return it. I don't know why we want to do it, but I'm sure it has something to do with an infatuation with cool gadgetry. On the flip, I think there is something to be said about the whole process, although I don't particularly know what it is. We decided that we should document every step of the way with video, and maybe create a short docu-film out of it. We'll probably even include some of the photos from our day shoots. I don't know what's going to happen afterwards, but I'm excited to see how it pans out. There's so much risk involved with this venture however. If something happens to the camera, we lose out on our four thousand dollars. When you think about, this idea seems really silly considering how much money is on the line; however, this stunt would provide too much excitement for me to give up. 4 grand is a lot of money to spend, but getting it back will be so sweet! And we will get it back...

check in soon to see how our little venture unfolds

The Selfdeprivator's Journey to Enlightenment

2009-11-22T22:46:00.000-08:00

We know who we are. We know exactly who we are. We are scared of ourselves, however. This is when we question ourselves and mask our selfdeprivation. Listen! we are not questioning some higher power of enlightenment. I thought I was questioning some powers stronger than I. It's occurred to me-- I knew all along who I was and am up to this point. Don't throw away the past. The past is you. Someone who knows you well can tell you a lot about yourself. I'll give myself to others. Others can help you. Someone I know well has told me a shitload. Don't be scared anymore. I'm not scared anymore.

I'm going to continue my quest, this rocky, frowned-upon quest. I shall have enlightenment. Travel this road and have your enlightenment.

Im ready,
Brandyn J

Flux

2009-10-12T23:06:00.000-07:00

I recently attended the Flux benefit art exhibit at St. Josephs cathedral (Arbor Hill), and it was cool. I've always had my doubts about art circles and scenes-- I've always seen them as phony and trendy. I'm not totally reneging on the aforementioned; however, I will admit that my opinion was definitely an uninformed judgment. Local art scene's aren't good for nothing. They are the perfect networking environment. Plus, the people are pretty cool. It's really comforting to see people working toward the same goal that you are (and not buku cash flow) (although it helps) (times are rough) (economy is shit) (AIG almost went under) (AIG son...)-- a social awareness. That I actually ended up here is a big surprise to me. Here's what happened (not exciting): My friend, Jim, has been working on a documentary about the local art scene and there response to the recent warehouse fire (The warehouse served as a haven for local art work and events) (I'll post more information on that soon), and he asked me to take photographs for it (he also had an inkling that I had an inkling (not the same kind of inkling) for local art). So he asked me to make it out; he suggested that I go and network a little. "Sure. What is good art, if it isn't judged by the amount of people you know." So I went two days before the actual show to snap some photos of the artists at work for the documentary. I dug it. I think I was more overwhelmed by the space (St. Josephs cathedral- built in 1860- fucking gorgeous) however. Plus, the lighting was awful, but I made it work. The actual show was very well put together (Thanks to the artists and Ken Jacobi), but I think the work couldve been a little stronger and better put together. Sam Contompasis assembled a 15ft square pyramid with a black/white and grey image on each of the bases. That was dope. Also, One Unit's gnome world installation was awesome, and so was Erik Savage's portrait of a four-eyed, bandaged young girl forcing herself to smile. I can't forget about Gregory Dunn's earth walker spewing garbage to the masses- oddly moving. There were some other things that caught my attention, but those were pieces that stuck out the most. In any environment, there are going to be artists who are more talented than others. Don't cut my throat. I'm fully aware of how subjective this is. The fact that there were both known and unknown artists says a lot about the community that these artists belong to though . On the contrary, I think the show was a little rushed. Some more work would've been nice.
Good news: I think my pre-notions about local art communities and scenes have been temporarily put aside. The people were cool. The art made statements. The music... oh yeah, the music was really good! I can't complain. I just wish I got some better pictures! Until next time.

Brandyn...

2009-10-04T00:22:00.000-07:00

Has a girlfriend! Hold all applause because I just realized why I haven't had one for so long (besides the obvious unattractiveness and lack of G). Its a three-syllable word called Jealousy, and as luck would have it I happen to fall victim to it every time. I don't trust girls for shit. I've grown up with them so I see what they do. They play men like play things... I'm totally ranting and possibly even venting to myself in response to my skepticism of everything, but a part of me thinks that maybe I should do the same- play women like play things. And for that, I wanna biggup my poppa. Perhaps I'm entirely ludicrous; however, hear me out. I'm young and so is she. She's gorgeous. I'm handsome. She's sexy. I'm simple. She's totally into me-- way too into me. And because this isn't a familiar feeling for me I am forced into believing that "she must be doing dirt!" Therefore, I think I should be doing dirt... I'm not though. I fucking hate relationships! (yet I'm always in constant search for one) When I get what I want I'm always drawn back into worry and stomach sickness whenever a situation arises that appears to be strange. They fucking suck!-relationships... Even when you make that decision to trust-- you say "it's your word over mine" you say "I can't always assume" you say "you're right I'm wrong"-- the thought creeps in and smacks you in the face! All I'm saying is that I would really like to finish reading A Streetcar Named Desire but I keep getting smacked in the face. I'm not really jealous though. I'm just saying.

PS- I'm back

Nothing Ever Proves Anything

2009-08-01T20:24:00.000-07:00

It's called disaster- that which leads to peace. Shadows gravel green grass the tree branch (which reaches up)(so suddenly up). I have just walked into the sun. So peaceful I's be shit so clear. Im in Love. This feeling: laughs and birds chirp above all is blue. So clear that I can't see straight. 20/20 up until this point in my life. The I's are fuzzy but all is wonderful.

P.S.- Thank You

Highway Blues

2009-07-08T20:39:00.000-07:00

Bloop Blurp feel uncomfortable It's 9 O'clock frequently and silence and mumbles laugh at lunch. The wheels on the bus spin continuously and towels get thrown in my direction. Part time sadness is white with VROOM.......... green grass flyby by bye pick up truck and yellow line. Sleep and dream awake and sing. I only see grey fuzziness. I am only my tight jeans.

a Camp Note

2009-06-28T20:11:00.000-07:00

*Bitter (after realization)

-Boredom-
Yap Yap Yap Yap Yap
Oh cut the shit! Am I bored or am I just disappointed.
People People
Yapping Yapping
Cabin 1 chore chart... WTF! Necessary?
Cute. Her- she's cute. I'm kind of creepy. Creepy?
no no no. He's creepy. He? He's a pain in the ass. Ass?
Yes. My ass. Your ass.
Ass Ass

Fuck pseudo communities.

A Boring and Forced Post for the Sake of Communication

2009-06-12T23:36:00.000-07:00

Hey. What's shaking? I know I haven't blogged in two months and for the 5 of you out there that actually follow my blog I apologize. I've decided to stay in Albany for the summer to take a course that I need to graduate, and since I'm here I decided to work as well. The thing is this: Albany is extremely quiet in the summer, and I have been desperate for company ("lonely"). As anyone who has been left to his/her own devices, quality time with yourself gets tiresome after a while. When you think about You, you realize things about that a. you didn't know b. didn't want to know and c. may actually be fabricated due to an immediate boredom. Your conscious is a killer. You begin trying to make connections between your past and your present, but it just ends up screwing with you. When I'm left to my own devices I get incredibly confused. What's confusing? Nothing really; however, when nothing is wrong something is wrong- according to your brain. I guess this is just another one of those sob "Who am I?" posts. 'Tis truly just a post for the sake of communication. I need some friends...

2 months later...

2009-05-28T14:25:00.000-07:00

A lot of stuff has happened, yet all I can think to comment on is one simple thing:

Barney Stinson is the coolest man on the planet...

seriously. no joke

Poem by Jackson Mac Low

2009-03-27T03:02:00.000-07:00

(projective verse)

2009-02-17T00:13:00.000-08:00

I-
can't-
think.
I can't breathe solitude. Wait.
Not solitude. Forgiveness.
No wait, not forgiveness
Calm She walks to existence and so does he
I stand and I watch yet I don't want to
Pound!
High five to guy that I know
It's cold and my hands freeze. It's cold.
I start to walk (blink blink blink SWOOSH! The wind blows)
The wind stops my motion as I walk toward existence. Backwards
I walk toward my existence. *Book in pocket
*Book out of pocket and down the hallway I think:
"But I did see the crows!"

An Eye for I

Nick and Norah

2009-02-17T00:03:00.000-08:00

i NEVER want to forget... Please don't ever let me forget
(25 minutes until the end)

Love

2009-02-16T23:59:00.000-08:00

"I can't think of anything I'd rather have than somebody loving me."
-Dakota Fanning

Throwing Tomatoes

2009-02-16T23:58:00.000-08:00

seems nice

Religion

2009-02-16T23:57:00.001-08:00

It gets people through

America

2009-02-15T22:53:00.000-08:00

The following is a note that I wrote to myself today

*Buy one item from each per check

Books
-Sally Mann "Immediate Family"
-Joel Meyerowitz "Cape of Light"
-More Vonnegut
-More H.G. Wells
-More Olson
-More Camus

Camera Stuff
-8X10 b/w film (tri-x 320 or Tmax)
-*Hasselblad (SAVE SAVE SAVE)
-*Large Format (SAVE SAVE SAVE)
4X5 or 8X10*
-Hood for 40D
-Alternative processes book from non-silver class
-Light meter (Once I get medium or large format)

*Clothes (last thing to think about)
-Sneakers
-Hoodie/s
-shirts

*Pay Bills! (1st thing to think about)

2 things:
a. I will either: I. probably never buy some of these things II. probably forget all about this list
III. not follow this list WHATSOEVER (if all goes well).
b. In order to live in this world you must be a part of it...

School Paper

2009-02-14T00:05:00.000-08:00

Prompt: We know that photography is good at documenting and attempting to be accurate (whatever limitations it has), so why do some photographers use the medium to show us fictions? Are they being inaccurate or misleading, or is the fiction visible? Does it matter? What are the different strategies used? And why in particular is photography an advantage?

A commentary on misleading fictional photography-
Or the lack thereof

-Brandyn Johnson

This is a funny topic (at least I think so). As soon as I read the prompt my first thought was "why the hell not?" Why wouldn't photography show us fictional situations? They show us everything else! In the prompt it says, We know that photography is good at documenting and attempting to be accurate..."(that we do), but it also questions whether fictional situations in photography are being "inaccurate" or "misleading." If photography is "accurate" then how can it ever be "misleading?" Any and everyone can agree that life is sometimes humorous, not to mention surreal, mysterious, and at times unexplainable (what is fictional photography but an alteration of the common in real life (what is the unexplainable and the mysterious but an alteration of the common in real life (Robert Cumming's slice of bread in a watermelon)!)?). Photography is an attempt at an accurate representaion of life; therefore, fictional situations, in photography, are nothing more that an accurately altered, personal relationship to an idea or subject.
Bruce Davidson shot the circus (Jimmy Armstrong the dwarf specifically), East 100th street, and Subways, amongst other things. Now in no way is his photography fictional (unless you argue that his content was biased) (but even that would be non-fictional) (although, one can make the point that the whole of life is fictional because of the lack of truth in the Person's familiarity with it) (but, again, that would be ridiculous because that's not anything that can ever be solved or proven correct). His photography is more or less social-documentary in its approach. Jeff Wall's photography ("Mimic" "Storyteller" "Milk"), on the flip-side, looks relatively social documentary; however, it is all staged. It's fictional! Despite the obvious- photography's ability to look all ways and every way (how can we know if a photo is true or not (besides from getting that information from the photographer (but even then, he/she can easily be fibbing (Sophie Calle for example (although, I don't think anyone knows if Sophie Calle was lying (if We do then I apologize for my ignorance))))?)- my point lies in the fact that photography is Art. Art is Everything. Therefore, photography is everything (or rather can and should be everything) and, again, can never be misleading. It doesn't matter if it's fictional or not.
(I dont mean to be repetitive) Art is Everything. If photography is Art (thanks to Rejlander, the Photo Secession, and society's consistently ongoing loss of ignorance (I have faith (in no way am I excluding myself from societal ignorance)!)) then it must, MOST CERTAINLY MUST be everything. It should explore (not exploit) the "unknown" and the "strange," the "common" and the "familiar," the BOOs and the BAAHs, the triangles circles and squares, the energy, the matter, and the space. If it doesn't do so then it is not Art. It just becomes a weird paradigm. It becomes only an idea that conforms to the all-mighty, all-doing, and all-blinding human familiarity.

Holy Shit,

2009-02-13T23:58:00.001-08:00

What am I doing?! I started to delete a couple of things (some actually got deleted!) and I started to realize that the decision to remove the post were completely impulsive! I can easily stop publishing journalistic posts (and, as you know I definitely will); however, I shouldn't delete them because they were all genuine feelings! Whatever. The point is that I will NOT delete any more of my personal posts because I want you to know about the moments. RIP Happy Post ("I got a feelin'. yeah yeah...") you are gone, but you will never be forgotten.

Apologies for those who have noticed

2009-02-13T23:45:00.000-08:00

Lately, my blog has become something similar to a diary, and for that I do sincerely apologize; however, on the defense I would like to mention that in life we face situations that we want people to know and care about. It then becomes hard to distinguish between what a blog post should be, and what should simply be written down in pink, heart-filled notebooks with titles that read, "PRIVATE." Well, whatever the case, I will try to shy away from sappy, personally related topics, and stick to the generally interesting, bizarre, funny, and again interesting. So as of now (after this post has been written and posted) I will delete anything 'journalistic' and will bless you with a post that follows the guidelines of my original concept. Until next time.

Oh yeah,

2009-01-09T18:33:00.000-08:00

Happy newyear

A post

2009-01-09T18:01:00.000-08:00

Staring blankly at something as unimportant as a computer screen doesn't create any sense of personal enlightenment within yourself. I must admit that I created that sentence after I had been staring at the computer screen for 20 minutes. Maybe my awakening awaits me at the end of this sentence... However true, what's the significance? However and if ever significant, well, who the hell cares? I'm back to being confused about the world, and as I write I begin to wonder if its just me rolling a clay world up into a ball. I think I'm just writing for the sake of writing like sometimes I feel I speak for the sole purpose of hearing myself speak. I think I sound so intellectual. Using big, cool words like "facade," comparing things to literature or poetry, and creating this unexplainable, difficult, almost impossible to understand understanding of reality that even I can't comprehend. As my own defense, let me first note that it all does make sense then and there; at that exact moment in time. But 2 minutes later and its gone... I dont want to post this, but if I dont I would be wasting electricty.

Epiphany

2008-12-15T07:03:00.000-08:00

I think I just had my life-long epiphany. In fact, if it isn't my epiphany then it is sure to closely follow as a result of this. I know how I want to spend the next 10 years of my life. Within the next 10 years I will have traveled to various states around the country photographing my voyages on little, family-owned ice-cream trucks. This is no joke.

Pipes

2008-11-23T22:01:00.000-08:00

The pressure of not having pressure is what busts pipes. Pressure busts' them as well though.

Seamore Bebored

2008-11-01T22:42:00.000-07:00

I sit in my room wondering about wondering. Thinking about trying to think. Its tough. There's a block that we run into when we make the conscious decision to attempt creative fluidity. All we want to do is create an art that effectively portrays our own sense of independence and ideology- a freedom of mind-state. But there is still a force. An obstacle. A piece of shit tumor that hinders individuality. And I'm not upset. There's is no reason to be. We cant be upset. We are spiritually unable. We live by the norms and experiences that have guided us throughout life. We cant be angry at the thing that has been so apparent since birth. So we sit and debate about debating. Trying to figure out a way to become Seamore Bebored- the person that lies behind the roadblock and under the mat. Shit luck. Seamore is living proof of the chaos theory. the one out of million that carries the capability to true individuality and the heir of a genuine smooth criminal... good luck finding him. Better yet let him come to you.

What's the Meaning!

2008-10-08T10:21:00.000-07:00

This photo is a composition of shots taken during one of my photo shoots. It was an attempt to recreate a gap ad (you've probably seen it) which advertised their (RED) line- a portion of the funds used to fight AIDS in Africa. When you look at this picture what do you see? Do you see a bunch of kids just having fun? Or do you see an underlying social effigy? Is it youth's way of exploiting subconscious America? My professor saw this recreation and went Mad (in a good way). She ranted on and on about how the photo represented something more than 8 kids in white. It represents a social movement from injustice while sarcastically pointing out the obvious. That's what she said.

Does it? Its interesting how people draw meaning out of something that isn't necessarily meaningful. My subjects showed up in white t-shirts by sheer coincidence. I chose "Do the white thing," because the gap ad reads "Do the red thing." Sure, you may mention that I could have chosen any color. It's arguable that white was a decision by some subconscious voice inside of me. I don't think that would be a fair assessment to make seeing that the idea of an inner call for social change is a matter of personal interpretation. I can concede this notion; however, my choosing white is truly a conscious decision. I chose white because it rhymes with right. I'm serious. The statement would then read "do the right thing." Although this would provide more reason for an audience to analyze this recreation more vigorously, I have to admit my ignorance. My plan was not to create any tool for change. It was only a recreation.

This brings me to my question. Why do people try to find meaning out of things most meaningless? I wonder if it's a way for people to create importance in a life where's all too much is null. The reality of it would be that we live in another world parallel to the one we are physically in. This "world" is more like a parallel dimension inside our minds that allows us to feel important by labeling ourselves according to some elaborate ideology (or maybe this is the actual world that we live in. The parallel dimension points towards euphoria). But this "ideology," or belief system is only a coy for something a lot less important: a need for constancy.

Itchy Eyes for Tarantino

2008-08-14T12:30:00.000-07:00

My eye itches. That should be the title of Tarantino’s next flick. It would be about a guy who, in search of his long lost charisma, finds comfort in his own ability to see the world as a hippie. It would star Clive Owen, and Denzel Washington. But, only if he’s interested of course. I don’t think I'm being cynical. I just think it’s funny how there are generally three groups of people in NYC. In New York City there are the “good” American citizens who never stop trying to achieve that American dream even after the so called “dream” has and had been fulfilled 20 years prior. In New York City there are the rebellious, stick-it-to-the-man muthafuckers. YEAH. Real Bad asses. The offspring of hippie parents with no purpose in the world but to be eccentric and cool and unlike any other person in NYC. They play their mom and dad’s Woodstock favorites on their IPODs and pretend to like awful songs because of a “movement” the songs represent. And in New York City there are lots of fucking tourists. I guess those are the normal, all-American, law abiding citizens from other states (and countries) who come to New York City to see a shit show of lights on 42^nd street, the statue of liberty- to remind them of the life-long presence of liberty and the pursuit of happiness- and to eat ridiculously over-priced steak at chain restaurants. My favorite is the IPOD hippie. So I think we (Tarantino and I) should make a film about hippies. Starring Clive Owen and Denzel Washington. But, only if he’s interested of course.

*Note

2008-06-10T22:22:00.000-07:00

The blogs that I post are only representative of my thoughts, feelings, and passions that I encounter from moment to moment. I'm not trying to rediscover or make change. Nor am I trying to change anyone's opinion of the world. It is simply random ramblings on things that I feel strongly about at that moment. Seriously...

Consider the Following

2008-05-04T04:08:00.000-07:00

Today was a good day-

Unproductive but good nevertheless.

What can I say?

She makes me happy.

What is the it?

Do you have it?

People die looking for it,

What a waste of life…

Music… wow.

Body trembles create happiness.

Happiness creates smiles.

Smiles create personality.

Personality creates music.

She sees me across the room,

But I act as if I don’t notice.

She sends me a drink.

I smile.

Oh, how the tables have turned.

Fingers determine the fate of humanity.

Hard ones result in capitalism

Mediocre ones are black with ink on a need-know basis.

Soft ones push the buttons that end all of humanity.

Please and thank you.

I’d offer to spank you, but

I think that’ll be rude.

Everyone’s a dude.

At least that’s what society believes.

Masculine- Blue

Feminine- Pink

Men wear pink shirts.

Look to fashion to change social constructs.

True beauty comes from subconscious.

As soon as beauty becomes conscious

It no longer stays beauty.

It becomes greed.

These scribbles are called words.

Read them, write them.

Recite them.

Do you C.

Holy shit!

Shit isn’t holy!

That’s preposterous.

What a dumb ideology to believe.

Black skin.

White skin.

racism?

Looks like a cow to me.

Hahahahahahahahah this is ridiculous

Delusional even

Stop writing

Go to sleep

You’re sick

Stop crying

Stop laughing

Dead

-suicide note

Sleep is eternal-

Reality is a dream

God is a nightmare

Wake up and see the black.

Believe it or not

I spotted a spot

Tick tock went the clock

And down he went with a swift blow to the gut!

Ouch.

That last one hurt.

This one feels good.

Feels real good.

Sex, Water, and Masturbation

2008-04-14T09:09:00.000-07:00

Sex
You watch her. She keeps putting down drinks and pays no attention to you. This is when you go to the bar and order two corona's for yourself (you look like a bad ass Mr. Double Fister!). You lose her, shit, so you hang out with your friends. Men undoubtedly have a superiority complex so you and your friends chug beers and shots to prove who has the biggest balls. Shit! She walks pass and gives you a look. Half hi my name is_____, half boxer's or briefs... You get excited and follow her NOT to quickly (She'll think your a creep) but wait... HURRY UP! You'll lose your chance. Guido Vito is already hitting on her. A really good song comes on and you're ready... pumped even. She's dancing with her fat friend. Of course she has a fat friend... You slide behind her, but not too aggressively (you don't want the fat friend to cock block). She gives the quick look back to see who it is, she notices you, smile of approval, SCORE! Dance all night, Drink all night, get sloppy then tell her how much more comfortable your bed is than hers. She'll say "nuh-uh!," and you'll say "I bet you a blow job." You're drunk so all inhibitions are lost. She's drunk so she thinks its hilarious. The cab back is fun. You have never had more saliva on your face, yet you don't care. Empire Quad. Swipe! Keys. Door. Shoes. Bed. Saliva. "I think I'm gonna...uh."
Water
Why did you drink that much? You're so dehydrated. 20 minutes of drunk sex and you got nothing out of it... No happy ending. All the pleasure went to her. Sucks, huh? You're not that tired so you go out and watch some TV. 2 hours later, after way too much Family Guy, Robot Chicken, and Metalocolypse, you decide to go to bed. Shit! You forgot that there's a naked drunk girl in your bed. Grab a pillow and hit the floor. Fuck! The floor sucks. Grab the pillow and hit the bed. dammit! She's naked and you're not. Decisions... 1.Take off your clothes: pros- It feels so much better. Cons- You'll want to go again. You'll get no sleep. 2.Put clothes on her: pros- you'll get to cuddle and eventually sleep. Cons- Ummm. No cons. You like sleep way too much. You grab a cup, pour some water, place it next to the bed, dress the Drunky, and hit the sheets.
Masturbation
How does this girl sleep so much!! You're up before she is. You go online, play a game a solitaire, check your email, and of course check the MYFACE. You read a little poetry then climb back into bed. You sleep for a good 30 minutes, and you both wake simultaneously. You're looking at her. She's looking at you. Fuck! Fuck! This better not be an awkward morning. She smiles. You smile. Offer her some water (She must be dying of thirst!) and chit chat a little. She makes up an excuse to go home, something like "I have so much laundry to do." Its 9 o'clock in the morning. Not even 20 loads would take her 15 hours. You agree and tell her you have to do the same. Call her a cab, pay, awkward kiss (on the cheek of course). Goodbye. You cuddled, you kissed, you had a boner the entire night. You go to the computer and check your email and MYFACE again. You try to hit the sheets, but you are definitely all slept out. There's only two things you want to do at this point: Get rid of your hangover and get rid of the pole in your pants. You drink some more water then you hit the free sites. Why pay when you can stream? You kill two birds with a stone and you've never felt better. Call up a buddy and force him to come to breakfast with you.

Simply Put: Women

2008-03-03T00:15:00.000-08:00

Throughout the course of my blog, you, the audience will sometimes come across a post titled "Simply Put." This is a section where I will name something as simple as "dog," for instance, and discuss my feeling toward that thing. This blog post is titled "Simply Put: Women." That means I will discuss woman. Simply put.
What is wrong with women. They are truly a species created to confuse the shit out of men. They are masterminds at mixed signals and true geniuses at making you feel like total shit. There are no words to explain what they do, how they do or why they do. We men just know that they do and it annoys the hell out of us. Lets explore the steps leading up to a full fledged relationship, and the little things girls do to make your life miserable.

Phase 1: The Meeting Stage (ex. Bar setting)
When we firsts notice a girl we will continuously, although nonchalantly, throw a few glances toward the girl in hopes of receiving some back. The girl will either throw the glance back or act completely void of her surroundings. Now whether or not the girl looks back doesn't necessarily determine anything. She could in fact be throwing glances when we aren't looking, or perhaps notices them but plays hard to get. So what do we do? We begin to wonder whether or not the girl is playing a game, or if she is genuinely not interested. Now we don't want to lose out on this girl so we think to ourselves "no risk, no reward. Whats the worsts that can happen. I'll be in the same position if I try than if I dont..." We begin to slightly freak out and wonder if the little things we do, i.e. stretch, 2-step, sip our drinks etc. are relatively attractive and attention worthy. So later on in the night we finally decide to make the move. We slowly move in, heart pumping like water through a water park, and mutter out a forced hey. The girl still plays hard to get! Now you gotta say really "outside the box" type of things to keep her attention and make her aware of you not-typical-ness. A lot of us just stop here, however the determined few work through the awkwardness. Now, I would think that the time spent would constitute some sort of payoff, but sadly nothing is guaranteed. We can either get really lucky, and the girl asks "what took you so long?" Or we can totally get shut down. So many awkward moments would be avoided if girls would just give guys a clear cut signal. A glance for a glance. Even sign language. Save us the inner conflict and embarrassment.

Phase 2: "Dating"
Oh man! You're almost in the door. The girl kinda likes you. She laughs at your jokes. She's always in a good mood around you. Never stops smiling. You think she's totally into you. Your totally into her. Oh how deceiving mixed signals can be. Whichever brain cell developed the concept of a mixed signal should be electromagnetically removed from each women across the world. Girls know within ten minutes of the first date whether or not they want to become more intimately involved with a guy. Some girls are really straight forward and abide by their standard of their ideal man. Others, in hopes of being polite, stick around and give the impression of interest. Don't do that! Just go. Id rather be told "no" than to believe yes. This leads to the issue of cuteness. We are tricked into believing that there might actually be some kind of connection so we try to be spontaneous, funny, and charming. We start thinking of cheesy ways to make women smile- unexpected breakfast in bed, silly poems, flowers and song grams. The girl can either call or not call. Then that leaves us guys wondering if those pure acts of generosity were mistaken for infatuation. We feel all weird and insecure, and the only thing that can redeem our self-esteem is a phone call. Sometimes we never get that call. We never really know why, and just the thought makes us all a little insane. Now, when the call comes there's always a good reaction. We are onto phase 3- The relationship.

The relationship is complicated and relatively unfamiliar. Look forward to "The Pessimistic View of the Optimistic Relationship."

24 hours of creativity

2008-02-26T21:22:00.000-08:00

Empire... A film of trial and tribulation. Despair and gloom. Love and lost. A roller coaster ride of emotion. This film is amazing. The lighting is perfect. So many goodies packed into 24 hours of black and white reversal film! I was so excited to watch this film for the first time. The next day I couldn't stop thinking about it! Incredible. Outrageously funny. Irrefutably intense. So packed with emotion. Empire was shot on High 8, but it totally looks like 35 mm. I just can't get enough of it...

And I attest to, in my statement aforementioned, the beginnings of a mild form of sarcasm called "Shut the fuck up Brandyn Johnson." I hope you enjoyed.

Andy Warhol is arguably the best of all time. The best phony, scam, con artist that the world has ever witnessed (besides of course the people who invented the bidet). I am not an art major, nor am I an expert on art, but I do know enough to declare Warhol as dumb. Just plain dumb. The structuralist way of looking at his art would be that by redrawing or examining an inanimate object you can thus recreate it. Warhol draws a Campbell soup can. The uber trendy, super hip hipster would stare at it for hours in awe. Can I intervene? It's a damn soup can! You probably have one in your kitchen cabinet. It's not being recreated as a form of nothingness. It's not a case of "who's to say." Who's to say that 2+2=5? Who's to say that a tree is a tree and a deer a deer? What does it matter! Common Sense people... Scottish common sense states, in simpler terms, that we shouldn't dwell upon the disillusionment of reality, the unknown of the known. If we, as humans, know a banana as a banana, do we really have to sit in a classroom or an art gallery and analyze the workings and structure of the real world and society through art and literature? A desk is a desk. It isn't just an object with no name. It's a desk. Now let us as a unified people move on to something more important like knitted Mittens and snow caps.

It isn't a case of disillusionment. I don't motion that we simply accept "the norm." The Enlightenment taught us that by questioning our place in the real world will ultimately makes us reality-aware and inherently human. However, I do motion to ignore the irrelevant theories in higher thinking. We can criticize, analyze, theorize... we can do all the "ize's," but at the end of the day we all agree on the current state of our existence. When all the debating is through, we will all still call a banana a banana. That's because it's what we "know."

*To see a clip from Empire- http://youtube.com/watch?v=7idi_5IaMrk

Yo

2008-02-26T20:55:00.000-08:00

Hi and welcome to my blog. If you're reading this then you are probably a stalker. However, I am wiling to bet a small wager that you are a friend of some sort. Perhaps we met in a different universe. Perhaps at the mall; American Eagle even (probably not). But the most important part is that you are here and are willing to listen to my nonsense once twice maybe three times a week. At this blog spot I will rant about the good, the bad, and even the ugly. I will argue the stupid, agree with the dumb and stick up for the handicap. I am every women. Its all in me. Ive never considered myself very interesting so please excuse me if you find yourself nodding off during one of my speeches on the godliness of cookie dough (it's going to happen) (I'm talking about cookie dough).
On the other hand, be prepared to see some wacky videos, cool pictures, paintings and excerpts from poems and lit. I will of course be discussing in some way or another how these inanimate objects and forces of creativity affect the world in which we live. Of course, it may not make sense sometimes. It may not even be relatively funny, but then again... It's my blog and I'm not always funny. Lets discuss the abstract, the common sensical, and the out right dumb. I want to explore society and expose the fallacious paradigms were are forced to accept. So I say welcome to the outside of the box. Its kinda cozy. Its kinda hot... Wear your shades and don't forget your sunscreen.